Oh My God

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Oh My GodOh My God!

by Michael Ashley
July 16, 2002

I ask you to ponder…

If God created us, what created God? A more powerful God? And what created that more powerful God… Another even more powerful God? Where does it end?

If before the Big Bang there was nothing, and every effect has a cause, then what caused the effect know as the Big Bang? Something had to. If you start with nothing, and add nothing to it, what do you have? NOTHING! It’s simple math. Zero plus zero equals zero. And if matter can neither be created nor destroyed, how can the universe be expanding? Isn’t the universe matter? If it’s expanding then where are we getting all this extra matter? Oh well, I guess it doesn’t matter cause if God wanted us to understand it then he would have told us. Then again, if God didn’t want us to understand then why would he give us the ability to logically reason and think and deduce and the instinct to explore, learn and succeed?

Well, maybe it’s part of his big master plan. His Divine design. I wonder if guys like Charles Manson and Jeffrey Dahmer were part of that plan?! Or Ryan White or Christopher Reeve?! Or Buster Douglass. I bet he’s laughing his ass off over that one.

But wait; if it is all part of God’s plan, then why do we punish people like Charles Manson? It’s not his fault that he is a sick fuck. God made him that way; set out a course of action, which he could not deviate from.

Similarly, why do we praise good performance? Mark McGuire hits 70 home runs. So what! God planned it that way. Mother Teresa, who the hell was she? So I am a bad person cause God makes me say “fuck” a lot? Fuck that.

What’s that you say? God doesn’t make me do anything I choose to say “fuck” a lot. Well, fuck you. If that’s true then who the fuck is God? He certainly isn’t all-powerful then. And if he is then he’s an evil prick for creating guys like Manson and for giving Ryan White AIDS. Certainly not a God I’m going to worship. Let me put it this way…

Either

  1. God created sick fucks like Manson and he himself is a sick fuck unworthy of worship; or
  2. God is powerless to stop sick fucks like Manson in which case he is not all-powerful and not worthy of worship; or
  3. God can stop sick fucks like Manson but chooses not too or just doesn’t care enough to in which case he is still not worthy of worship because he allows us to suffer when he doesn’t have to.

    It goes like this. Suffering exists. Either God can’t stop it or doesn’t want to stop it. Either way, this is no God worthy of the adoration, admiration, and worship of all mankind.

    But there is also a forth option. My personal favorite.

  4. There is no God.

You know what I call god?… The first identifiable source of anything in the history of existence. Right now, we have no idea what this is. It could be a benevolent force, which decided to create the universe and life. It could be a singularity of energy, which exploded into the big bang thus creating the universe and life. It could be an immortal tadpole, which has always been floating around a tiny plane of matter and energy somewhere in space (whatever that is). Or it could be something we may never know.

But whatever it is, it somehow evolved us into reasoning, logical human beings. Some of us, many of us, squander that ability. So I ask you, I beg you to use your “God” given ability to reason and think about things before blindly committing your faith to them. For to me, that is the ultimate sin.


Michael Ashley is frustrated with the complacency of the human race. His degree is in Psychology however he currently works in Business Management.